They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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