Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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