mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
