new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
She's like a pop up book from hell.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
