Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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