the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize