I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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