You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
