I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
