I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize