this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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