I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
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