"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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