Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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