what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
