I love black thongs
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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