i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
