We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize