it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Randomize
