I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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