I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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