Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Randomize
