so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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