I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
