I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
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