My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
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