well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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