these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
