I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I intend to get homeless drunk
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
