i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
