just come out here and I will go home with you...
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
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