I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
