You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
