I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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