Sry I called you an 8
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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