so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
