Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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