I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
She bit a glass in half.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
