Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Randomize