I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Randomize
