i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
