Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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