Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
