whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize