Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
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