I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
