he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I party with great urgency now.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
