my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
My dick has a subreddit
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Randomize
