So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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