I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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