First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
he fucked my hip out of place.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
They left me at home... I'm a liability
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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