Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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